Episode 22: The Real Reason You Don’t Feel Confident (Quick Bite)

If you’ve ever wished you “felt more confident”—more ready, capable, certain, or fearless—you’re not alone. But what if confidence isn’t actually what you’re missing?

In this Relish Quick Bite, Alyssia Sheikh reveals the real reason confidence feels out of reach and why most confidence advice fails. What we typically call “confidence” is actually performative confidence—a fragile, achievement-dependent mask that collapses the moment circumstances change.

The thing we’re truly longing for is something deeper: a reliable inner steadiness that doesn’t depend on appearance, outcomes, or guarantees.

Through clear definitions, nervous-system insights, and a personal story about her pivot from Mind Over Munch into Relish, Alyssia unpacks how external confidence traps us—and how inner alignment changes everything. You’ll walk away knowing why you don’t feel confident and what your system is actually craving instead.

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✨ In this episode, you’ll learn:
• The real difference between confidence and the deeper quality underneath it
• Why external, performative confidence collapses during change
• How we confuse “certainty” with “confidence”
• Why authentic steadiness comes from within, not from proof
• A practical reflection to feel the difference between performing confidence vs moving from true groundedness

💭 Reflection:
Think of an area where you want to feel more confident. What would change if you stopped trying to perform confidence—and instead listened inward for what’s already true?

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• Email me: [email protected]
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• The Hoffman Institute (Alyssia is a Hoffman Process teacher; podcast is not affiliated)

Relevant Episodes: 

• Be Do Have

• Feel to Know (Science of Emotions)
• Compassion in Action

Relevant Links & Resources:

• Self-Compassion (Kristen Neff) https://self-compassion.org